image via Flickr user Ursula Le Guin

A few days ago my daughter, who isn’t even 3 years old yet, said something that shocked me.

She took my hands, looked me square in the eyes, and said in all seriousness, “Mommy, I don’t need you any more. I’m ready to be a grown up and get my own house.”

Ouch!

“Why would you want to be a grown up?,” I asked. “Don’t you have so much fun being a 2-year-old?”

“Well, when I’m a grown up, I’m going to live in my own house, chew gum, and drink caffeine,” she explained. She would also have her own children, a boy named Boy and a girl named Girly. And she’d like them to visit me often for play dates.

After the initial sting wore off (and the humor set in), I realized how completely normal, and actually very good, it is to want to be more independent. (I also realized that right now, when she grows up, she wants to be like me, which is super sweet, right? But I better pay attention to the things I do around her!)

It’s human nature to want to be independent and do your own thing. While collaboration and community are no doubt important, there’s nothing more empowering than knowing you have all the tools you need to do things on your own. This is especially true on the yoga mat.

Have you ever had the experience of unrolling your mat at home, but you just have no idea where to start? Are you so used to your teacher’s guidance that you have absolutely no clue how to practice on your own? You’re not alone.

I often talk to my yoga students about the importance of developing their own yoga practice during those times they can’t make it to a class. Even when they’re in class, I want them to develop the skills of listening to their bodies, following their own breathing (even when it doesn’t sync with my cues exactly). It’s the difference between giving someone fish for dinner versus giving them their own fishing pole and teaching them how to use it. Practicing on your own gives you insights into yourself that you just can’t and won’t get if you only practice in a group setting.

Ready to dive in?

Here are a few quick-and-easy tips to finding more freedom (and independence) on your yoga mat.

1. Keep it simple. You don’t have to do a complicated hour-long sequence in the same way you would at your favorite yoga studio to reap the benefits. Even if you only remember a few poses at a time, it will give you an opportunity to explore what your body needs and tune into your breath. In my opinion, that’s far more valuable that even the fanciest asana sequence.

2. Start small. Practice your 3 favorite poses for 2 minutes each might be all you need to do at first to jump-start a regular, consistent, and amazingly beneficial home practice. Start there, then add on when the spirit moves you.

3. Know that it’s OK to make things up as you go. I’ll let you in on a secret. I don’t always know every pose I’m going to teach before I get in front of my classes. In fact, most of the time I have a good idea what pose I want to end up in. Sometimes we get there, sometimes it’s totally inappropriate for who shows up that day. So I have to make things up as I go. Sometimes the poses that I come up with on the fly makes perfect sense, sometimes it doesn’t at all. The sequence doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to give you a chance to move, stretch, breathe, and feel.

4. Prepare the body for a specific action. Once you start to feel more comfortable unrolling your mat on your own, you can start to get more specific. Maybe you work on your hips one day and your twists another day.

5. Ask your teacher for help. Just because you’re going it alone sometimes doesn’t mean you should stop going to class. Maybe using your teacher as a resource means you use something you learned from your weekly class with her as inspiration for your home practice that week. Or get to class early to ask her specifically for some pose ideas for you. I, for one, would be thrilled to help. Even better, schedule a private lesson so you can work together to develop a plan that will help you improve your yoga poses—and your life!