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Last week, I went on a second “date” with a local yoga teacher. I like him because he teaches super difficult poses that I’d probably never venture to try on my own. Padma Mayurasana (Bound Peacock Pose) is one of those poses, and I fell in love with it because this was the first time I was ever able to lift my legs, which were twisted into Lotus, off the floor. (Never mind the fact that I had to put my chin on the floor to get the leverage to do it.) I loved my teacher’s joke. “Remember, breasts are not helpful for this pose … but they are in about 95 percent of the rest of your life, so deal.” But I have breasts (a little) and I could still do it!
I beamed. I was (and am) so freaking proud of myself it borders on obscene. I feel like that every time I accomplish something I once thought was an impossible feat for me in yoga. And every time, I question myself later.
Yoga should boost your confidence, but it isn’t supposed to build up your ego. Is it completely against all the principles of yoga to look around the yoga studio and feel just a little bit like a rock star when you’re the only one who can do a hard pose? Or is it OK to be proud of yourself and even a little amazed at what this body can do?
How do you find the middle ground?
I don't think feeling proud of what your body can do is antithetical to yoga. I think feeling superior to others because of what your body can do is a little dangerous…but oh so tempting sometimes! But that, too, can be part of the practice, can't it?
And I think it's totally fine if others give you props, because dang that's an awesome pose! Go you!
I think it's OK be be proud & amazed with yourself & body, it encourages you to keep up the work of staying physical tuned in. As for feeling like a rock star, we all could use that every once in a while; it's when it overtakes us and we lose sight of the goal of yoga that it's a problem.
As for your teacher's breast joke – that cracked me up! I've never been quite able to finagle peacock and was sure it fault of my boobs. (Was that TMI???)
This reminds me of the time one of favorite teachers was taking suggestions for the days class – and someone requested "getting rid of his ego". She said to him – but your ego makes you who you are – we don't want to get rid of THAT!
Also – I think those little accomplishment highs are a good thing. They're part of why a lot of people keep coming back to the mat. I mean, in Anusara yoga we take the time to stop and clap for people. I think it's a very good thing.
Onto the peacock – breast thing… darn boobs. I'm certain they're the main reason I can't really do it, but my husband can.
I agree that it is Ok & natural to feel proud! It should feel good to achieve as long as you aren't totally attached. Very different than showing off, leave that to peacocks.
Thanks for all the support!
I forgot the best part.. When I got home I was still really excited so I called my husband over so he could watch what I could do. He smiled looking a little confused and said, "Good job. You look like an amputee." And he walked away. Nothing like a significant other to keeps you in check. 🙂