This afternoon, I went to a class at a new studio. I unrolled my mat next to a cute couple, who seemed to be on a yoga date. The woman, wearing head-to-toe Lululemon, was clearly an avid yoga enthusiast. The man seemed to be taking his first-ever yoga class. It was pretty stinkin’ cute. As I was waiting for class to begin, my mind wandered. “Oh, why can’t MY husband get his ass off the couch (and away from the Final Four) long enough to share in something that’s SO important to me? I’m SO neglected…” (Wah wah wah!)
Then I heard this: “You see?… You use the strap like this. It’s for when you’re not flexible enough to touch your toes… You’ll probably need it because, well…” The woman’s voice trailed off as she gestured toward the man’s legs. He said nothing.
THAT’S when it occurred to me that perhaps my husband would rather watch basketball than come to yoga with me because, like the young woman who somehow managed to convince her boyfriend to come to yoga with her today, I’m a total yoga nag! I’m always nagging him to come to yoga with me, but he thinks I’d be an obnoxious know-it-all nag at the studio. He’s probably right.
Throughout the class, I noticed that when the teacher suggested the use of a prop, the Yoga Nag would turn around and motion to her beau that he should use it. (And many times he actually didn’t need to.) The poor guy did as he was told, then when his date turned around, he put the prop down and did his own thing.
When class was over and we were packing up our mats the Yoga Nag said out of nowhere, “Don’t worry. You’ll get the hang of it. You just need more practice.” Her Yoga Victim was silent. I have a feeling this would his first and last yoga class—and who could blame him?!
What I learned from yoga class today: It might be OK to nag your guy to do the dishes, but don’t nag him to go to yoga with you. And please, if you are ever lucky enough to get him to set foot in a studio, just keep your mouth shut during the class and let him experience it for himself.
Hi, Erica.
My 2nd Yoga blog ever was this one on the Yoga Journal Community:
More Ideas About How to Trick Your Husband into Doing Yoga
"Well, I was going to suggest starting him off with erotic Tantric Yoga and work back from there. But you might never be able to "work back from there"!
All kidding aside, my wife talked me into going to Yoga class a few years ago with her by telling me it would improve my tennis. I think the sports angle is really the best to start with. Tell him Yoga is great physical AND mental sports training, which it is. Tell him it will make him more even more physically appealing to you than he already is. You won't be able to resist him.
In my case, I loved the poses, but I started reading about Yoga, one thing led to another, and now Yoga philosophy is one of my big passions (along with flamenco guitar) to the extent that I'm writing a book about my experience.
Tennis, and everything else in my life, for that matter, is like Yoga meditation. And I owe it all to my lovely wife, Jane (she loves it when I say that.)"
I went back and looked, and it turns out that my blog was in response to your blog that went like this:
10 Ways to Trick Your Husband into Doing Yoga
"1. Tell him it will make him sleep like a baby — a happy, relaxed, content baby.
2. Try this line: "Yoga is about being, not about doing. You're actually doing it right now, Honey. You just don't know it."
3. Embody the bliss . . . and wait for him to come to you. I think it was Alanna Kaivalya who in a workshop I took with her at the Miami YJ Yoga Conference said you can't get someone to come to your way of thinking by forcing them. It's much more effective if you attract them by being nonchalant and mysterious about it. "Wow, you look really relaxed and great lately . . . What are you doing?" "Oh, nothing really. It's just the yoga. You can come with me next time if you want."
4. Start simple, with one pose. I suggest Savasana (Corpse Pose) or Viparita Karani (Legs-Up-the-Wall Pose).
5. Let him think it's a massage. Spy your dearest hunched over his keyboard. Take the opportunity to give him a sweet shoulder adjustment. Over time, you'll see him sit up a little straighter in the chair.
6. Sneak a little yoga philosophy into your everyday conversations. "I'm sorry you had a bad day at work. But we can enjoy the evening together, right? Just be here in the present moment?"
7. Take advantage of holidays, birthdays, and special occasions. Anwser the question "What do you want for your birthday/Christmas/Valentine's Day/our anniversary?" with a simple. "If you don't know what to get you could always just go to a yoga class with me . . ." Just make sure it's a jovial suggestion, and not a guilt trip or a nag.
8. Play Krishna Das in the background while you're doing chores around the house.
9. Don't try to be his teacher. Imagine how you'd feel if he were correcting your poses. Unless you're doing a restorative practice together, leave your house and go to a class for heavens sake! You want this to be a pleasant experience not something that causes an argument.
10. Make sure your intentions are for his happiness and well-being, not your own."
Sound like none of these tricks has worked very well so far!
Bob Weisenberg
YogaDemystified.com
(Here are the links to Yoga Journal if you want to see the originals and many comments: http://bit.ly/asjsZH http://bit.ly/c5hFMN )
Ha! Well, they kind of work. I've just had to shift my thinking about what "doing yoga" actually means.. I do think that he kind of gets the theory and philosophy of it all, though he still has no intention of setting foot in the studio. And, really, that should be enough for me! I'm working on it.
This post is great – I tried for a while to get my hubs into yoga to no avail. And that's ok. I'm sure I would have been a nag had I gotten him into class and I would have horrified you too.